"

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s Adam and STEPHEN. With a “P-H”.

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s Adam and Kevin. Don’t get Adam started on Steve, he was the worst.

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s Eve and Lilith.

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s Adam and Carol and Ted and Alice.

It’s not Adam and Steve, I mean, it was at one point, but it’s Adam and Stephanie now. You didn’t hear?

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s Eve. Just Eve. Happy by herself.

It’s not Adam and Steve, it’s eesh, look, I’ll date at some point but I’m just too busy right now. Give it time.

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" Oh, there are so many lives. How we wish we could live them concurrently instead of one by one by one. We could select the best pieces of each, stringing them together like a strand of pearls. But that’s not how it works. A human life is a beautiful mess. "
Things people with Social Anxiety do

survivide:

•go to the bathroom to escape

•feel very uncomfortable without a phone or some other crutch

•dwell on a small awkward moment for much longer than necessary

•never go to any social event without a person that makes you feel comfortable

•follow said person way too much

•worry about the person beginning to find you obnoxious

•faking an illness to get out of a social event

•Don’t buy something necessary because the cashier is intimidating. 

(via marisa93)

remember to drink lots of water, because your insides are a swampy bog and a water shortage would affect the local frog population

(Source: lesbianmooncolony, via teenslothlovetriangle)